Speaking of stationary

You must be a .03 mm mechanical pencil cause babe you’re fiiiiiiine.

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  • #pick up lines #i'm not sorry okay #please don't actually use these #just for loved ones #embarrass them like crazy
  • 16 hours ago
  • 7

To a police officer…?

Are you a tazer? Cause you’re pretty stunning.

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  • #ohohohoho #pick up lines #are still on #cuz mi boyfriend brought it up #and these are the results #does anyone actually read the tags I wonder
  • 1 day ago

You know what I LOVE??? I LOVE HAVING TILE AND WOOD FLOORING BECAUSE WEARING SOCKS YOU CAN SLIDE ACROSS THE LIVING ROOM TO THE KITCHEN IN HALF THE EFFORT AND TWICE THE FUN AHHHHHH?!??!?!

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  • #um #what
  • 2 days ago
  • 3

Salmon Song

I will return, no worries little one
Lay your head down on the river bed
The sky guides the ocean so I will find my way back to my home
where you are, wherever that may be

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  • #song #longsongpostsahoy #poem #poetry #leaving
  • 3 days ago
  • 3

When someone doesn’t know how adorable they are

*achoo* Sorry, I’m allergic to cuteness, you seem to have it all over you.

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  • #pick up lines
  • 4 days ago
  • 6

To oblivious yet attractive people

Excuse me, but I think its against the law to be that gorgeous, you’ll need to come with me.

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  • #pick up lines
  • 5 days ago
  • 1

To passerby

Hey! You! I saw that! No, you. Yes. Give it back. I know you stole my heart.

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  • #pick up lines
  • 6 days ago
  • 1

To someone looking for directions

Well, you may be lost, but I think I just found my other half.

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  • #pick up lines
  • 1 week ago
  • 2

While in a crowded place with someone cute (whose hand you want to hold)

Please don’t get lost…I can’t even begin to describe how amazing you are…

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  • #pick up lines
  • 1 week ago
  • 1

To an awesome anything

On a scale of one to ten, how does it feel to be the most beautiful being in the universe?

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  • #pick up lines
  • 1 week ago
  • 4

To someone beautiful

Look at all the pretty stars! How dimly they glitter at your presence.

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  • #pick up lines
  • 1 week ago
  • 1

Hi, if you need a pick-me-up

or if you’re lonely
or if you’ve never had a stranger gift you a compliment
or if you forgot how spectacular you are
or if you want to laugh at some of the things I’ve thought about using to embarrass my friends and loved ones
the following are several some pretty bad pick up lines
and I’d like to share them with you lovely folks. c:

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  • #let the love begin
  • 1 week ago

Okay, things can be seriously cute but

can something be hilariously cute?

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  • #question
  • 1 week ago
  • 1
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  • #glue #marijuana
  • 1 week ago
  • 6
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  • #frog #ittybitty
  • 2 weeks ago
  • 1
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